I feel really weird right now. Not weird in the crazy,mad,loopy,tipsy kind of way; rather bad,nervous,really weird kind of weird.
It all started when I was reading previous issues of Candy magazines that I have...and then I came across something that someone said...it went something like...
It's scary the way girls stare at you. You can see what they're thinking and how they're feeling.
Guys affirm me here. Is that true? Cause when I used to look at you-know-who it's usually a blank look. It's not even a stare.
But then again, my eyes always betray me.
After that I turned the page into this "Dowsing" Thing. Apparently, you put a pendant of your necklace above the center of this pie,which is divided into 12 slices, each showing an object (note cards, book, coffee cup, ipod, cologne, alphabet stamps, shoes, magic 8 ball, charm necklace, sunglasses, music box...) and then you close your eyes, repeat a relationship question on your mind for several times, and then open it and find out which direction--or slice,rather--your pendant swings the most.
You don't have to find out my question to know why I'm feeling paranoid... The pendant pointed into "shoes" which said:
Sometimes, the best thing to do when you find yourself in a stitch is to
walk away. If your guy is doing you no good, put on your favorite pair of shoes
and take a stroll to some place better. Maybe you're destined to meet a cuter
guy, or maybe it's best you appreciate the single life now.
Uhm, look. It's not as if I have a boyfriend, but you must understand what this means to me. Get over the guy.
Haha. That's easy. Oh yeah. Supposedly, I'm supposed to start a "new" life.
How do I put this to you,honey. It ain't that easy.
I don't know why, 'cause I don't love the guy,and I don't know the person!
And then I watched Laguna Beach (Tessa,the narrator is apparently PART Filipina! Be proud!) and then guys were talking behind their girl's backs. Is that how it goes? I mean, that was kinda mean, saying something and not meaning it. Like what happened,to Alex and Raquel/Rocky. Guys are so different around girls. Does that mean that that's who they really are?
Ahh. Now I know how I feel. I feel anxious, and...oblivious to whatever's going on. Right. Oblivious.
I feel anxious because he's turning into someone I don't know. Anxious because I'm not supposed to meddle with his life, 'cause it's his. I feel so bad because I shouldn't even care after all that has happened. I shouldn't even be writing about it. Anxious, because maybe I didn't know him at all.
It's funny how a silly teen reality MTV show can make you realize--not to mention be paranoid-- about so many things.
By the way, Cami and Kyndra are so mean. I was supposed to like Lexie, until I remembered she was part of Kyndra's clique.
Grabe, I feel so bad about myself. I don't know what to do if I cross paths with this guy,now that I'm pretty darn sure I'm taking the soccer training at San Beda. (Finally, a cross in my to do list--yet,though.) Apparently, Nicole H. considered me into it. I guess I was just waiting for someone to go with me.
See, I'm paranoid again, 'cause he might be thinking that all that I know was researched on the internet...After all,that is what I'm known for (or what I think of myself)--my research capabilities. Dear Lord, give me a break and for once believe that all I know is something I have 'researched' prior to our discussion...if you get what I mean. I tried to find about it before you considered asking me about it.
Just get the point.